Okay.
I've had a lot of people ask me what I thought of being team green with Reid. Having found out with both Carter and Brynn, I think I bring a different perspective to the table. Usually people are on one team or the other, so they can't compare the two.
But, I'm going too.
I've always said that I think finding out is just as exciting as waiting, and I still think that holds true. They're both special in their own way. And it's a surprise no matter what... in the ultrasound room, at a gender reveal party or during the actual birth. You didn't know what the sex was before the event and now you do.
Surprise.
I will say that I enjoyed the anticipation of team green. It's like waiting for your Christmas presents, knowing exactly where they're hidden, but refusing to peak at them. You can't wait to find out, but you're willing too, just to make Christmas more exciting and special.
However, when it's a baby, there's really not anything that could make it more special than it already is. It's your baby. Being born. And you're meeting him/her for the first time. Who cares what the sex is... it's YOUR! BABY! for goodness sake. Ahhhhh.
It's life changing.
So, although the anticipation of waiting was fun, I really don't think it made the birth any more special. For me and Bob at least... I'm sure it was fun for others who were waiting for the announcement {which must be true considering I had about 12,000 hits to my blog the day I posted this.} And, personally, I know I stalk other people's blogs/FB pages when I know they're about to deliver a team green baby.
It's fun and exciting. But it doesn't make it more special.
{Side Note: Considering that I had weekly Biophysical Profile ultrasounds starting at the 28 week mark, I'd say "refusing to peak" became more annoying than anything else. At that point in my pregnancy, I had no interest in knowing the sex of the baby, and I was more worried about the ultrasound tech's use of pronouns throughout the ultrasounds than anything else. I didn't want an accidental slip-up. And, had I known that I was going to have weekly BPPs from the start, I likely would have never been team green in the first place. But, alas, I had no idea that I would become high risk and it all worked out just fine.}
So the question is... am I glad I did it?
Yes. 100%.
Would I ever do it again?
Absolutely not.
The problem that I had the entire pregnancy with being on team green? It held true. For the night that Reid was born, Bob and I were overjoyed over our sweet, precious {and absolutely adorable} little boy, but we were also both a little sad. Just a teeny, tiny bit. Not because we had a boy. But because we didn't have a girl. And the same would have held true if we had a girl on September 10th. We would have been sad that we didn't have a boy.
I know this sounds crazy, but it was exactly how we both felt that day. And I knew it would happen. I knew it would. Because the moment Bob yelled "it's a BOY!" in the delivery room, that other little person that we'd been dreaming about for so long? Our girl. She disappeared forever. She will never exist for us. We spent 9 months picturing our life with both babies. Preparing for a boy and a girl. But in reality? We only got to keep one.
Of course we obviously knew that we only would have a boy OR a girl and not both... but when you wait until the baby is delivered before finding out the sex, there is no time to prepare yourself. Boy. Girl. It doesn't matter. They're here. And they need you. At least when you find out early, you have some time to mentally prepare yourself for what is about to happen. It's not thrown right in your face with no time to adjust to this life-altering event.
Basically, when you're on team green? There is no preparation. None, what-so-ever. You think you're prepared, but you really have no idea what you're in for until the baby is already here. Then, BOOM. You have to adjust. Just like that.
To give you an idea of what I mean... on the night that Reid was born, Bob and I were in the room alone for the very first time with our sweet boy. Just staring at him. Taking him in. Smelling his perfect new baby scent. Holding his little hands. Kissing his soft little chubby cheeks as he slept. It was the same instant, all-consuming love that I felt with Carter and Brynn. Like my heart could burst with joy. I asked Bob to get me something from the diaper bag for the baby and, sitting on the very top, was the "Emerson" hat and the "Little Sister" outfit we got in preparation for a girl. And, as we held our brand new beautiful son, we couldn't help but tear up over the daughter that we didn't have that day.
It's a confusing feeling.
Being thankful for what you have, but also mourning the loss of something that never was.
So, if I'm being completely honest {which, hello, have you met me?}... Although I'm so glad that I had this experience, I didn't think the wait of team green was worth it. And, if we go for baby #4 {wait, what? who said that?} we will absolutely be finding out what we're having.
Obviously these two crazy people need more time to mentally prepare.
