02 February 2010

Loving Another

Ya know how some second time mom's wonder how they're ever going to love another baby as much as they love their first? They don't know how they're going to split their time between the two? They know their first baby will not get all of their attention anymore, and therefore they feel bad for said child? Do you know what second time mom's that I'm talking about?

Well, I am not one of them.

I never understood that thought process. How could anyone possibly ever think that they will not love a second child as much as their first? That they will feel bad for their first child because they will not have all of the attention anymore? Ya know who they should really feel bad for, in that case? The second baby. That child will never have all of the attention.

I don't mean to sound judgmental... I'm sure these thoughts are natural for some. I guess I just don't get it. Maybe because I'm a second {and middle} child myself? Or maybe it's because I have a totally different thought process when it comes to adding a second {or third, etc.} baby to the family?

Let me explain...

Mom's... do you remember when your first baby was born? When you met your baby for the very first time? When you spoke to your baby and they recognized your voice?

Okay, don't cry... stay with me.

How special was that moment? How special were alllll the wonderful moments that followed it since your baby was born? I'm sure your life is filled with so much love and joy that you can hardly stand it.

Are you still with me? Okay good.

Now multiply that times 2. Can you imagine that kind of love? That's how I feel about having a second baby.

I can't wait to love another.

I already do.

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danielle said...

Jenni, I feel the same way you do...I didn't have that fear when I had my second and now with the third on his/her way my love is going to multiply by a million!! I'm excited to LOVE another little baby too!

Anonymous said...

Um, I am one of those moms. Don't get me wrong I know when I see that new little baby I will love him just as much as Landon. It's more about actually visualizing how being a mom of two will work. Obviously, I won't figure that out until the time comes. And I know some of the time I will struggle with juggling two and some of the time it will feel totally natural.

I can't wait to have another to love. I feel like I have so much love to give. If we had a crazy amount of money I might even go all "Duggar" on my husband. I'm just worried about the transiion even though I know deep inside that everything happens for a reason and this baby is already such a big part of our family.

It's my anxiety issues getting the best of me, Jenni!

MrsKBJ said...

I totally agree! I am just worried about how I will go grocery shopping, ect. Getting out of the house will be a bit of a challenge, but I am sure you just get used to it and deal!! :O)

BTW, I know you are a LOST fan!! YAY for tonight!! :O)

Anonymous said...

I totally agree. Before Isaac was born, I didn't understand how I was going to love him as much as everyone said I would. But then he arrived and I can't take my eyes off him. Only a mom can understand how much I love my son. And I know it will be the same way with our second - having that experience with the first, even though I was a bit doubtful, makes me confident for the second.

jenni from the blog said...

@ Danielle- thanks for sharing, soon-to-be mom of THREE! Can't wait to hear what you're having!!

@ Molly- My list of fears for this baby is VERY long, but actually thinking that I may not have enough love for her is just impossible. It's a fear that I just don't have.

Personally, I think being a mom of two = not leaving your house for a VERY long time ;)

@ KBJ- I am so excited for LOST that I can barely sit!!

@ Kristal- After reading your birth story, it makes me happy that you're even talking about another baby. Now that's love. ;)

Sara said...

I totally agree! In fact, I told my husband that I was so excited about baby #2 AND that it was a girl (I have ALWAYS wanted a baby girl) that I was actually afraid I would love baby #2 even more than Jacob!

For the record, that wasn't even possible, especially after what we went through with Jacob being born at 24 weeks. My MIL had to pry him out of my hands when he was a year old so I would let her babysit for the first time and it was just for one hour!

I can safely say that I am even MORE excited for baby #3 and can't wait until we start TTC this Summer. I am already thinking about who he/she will look like, whether it will be a boy/girl and names! I am crazy....

jenni from the blog said...

@ Sara- That's not a fair comparison b/c you make miracle babies ;)

We want 3 too! That's so exciting =)

erin farrell photography said...

have you read this before?

Erica said...

yep....that made me cry. It took me back to that moment when Brandt was born. We aren't expecting another baby....yet! But I feel the same as you. I can't wait to love another. :)


kacy said...

just think- i'm the youngest of us three and i am clearly loved the most. for obvious reasons. xoxo, kacy

jenni from the blog said...

@ Erin- NO! Thanks so much for sharing that!! And now I'm crying!

@ Erica- I"m so excited about it =)

@ Kacy- You're so right. I figured that mom and dad love you best, so clearly you can love another child more then the ones that come before. That's the only reason I have this theory! Thanks honey!

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