26 September 2014

Brynn

So, Brynn turned 4 in May and is old enough to play soccer this year.  She excitedly helped pick out her little cleats and shinguards and couldn't wait to get on the field to play after watching Carter from the sidelines these past 2 years. 

When we took her to her first practice, she was OMGSOEXCITED and could barely contain it...
 ...but as soon as we handed over her soccer ball and pointed her in the direction of her team, her smile disappeared. The face that she gave me as she slowly walked towards her team and looked back, kind of broke my heart.  Her big blue eyes were welling up with tears.  She then ran back towards me, saying that she was scared. 

I walked over to her team with her and held her hand as she listened to the coach's directions.  But she refused to play.  She just stood there next to me, frozen.  I tried to encourage her, but she kept repeating that she was scared.  She also didn't want to talk to the coach or any of the kids on her team.  As I held her hand, I started getting her to dribble the ball in the cones and play the shark game with the kids, so that she could take part in the practice.  As she felt more comfortable, I slowly started backing away and returned to the sidelines with Bob to watch the practice.

Now we know that Brynn is a very shy kid, but she usually has no problem playing with other kids once she feels comfortable.

Fast forward 3 days later to her very first soccer game.  She excitedly got ready, putting her way-too-big uniform on and shoving her little feet into the cutest pair of soccer cleats my eyes have ever seen.  And as we drove to the field, she talked with Carter in the back seat about how they were both going to score a goal in their respective games. 

But once we got out of the car, we saw that same face we saw at her first practice.  I held her hand as we walked to the field and took her to the other side to be with her team.  I slowly started walking to the parents side when I heard her crying.  I then spent the next hour trying to calm her down instead of watching her play her first game.  Nope, she didn't play at all.  She actually refused to go in.  But as soon as that final whistle blew, you bet she was the first person in line for the team snack.  #thatsmygirl

The very next morning, team pictures were scheduled. We woke up early to get Carter and Brynn ready.  Carter's team was first, and he did awesome.  We then waited an hour at the field for Brynn's team pictures.  But do you think she got hers taken?  Not a chance.  Again, she refused.  And her second practice a few days later?  Nope, not happening.

I continuously leave the field feeling frustrated and unsure of what to do.  I obviously don't want to force her to play soccer if she doesn't want too, but at the same time, she asks me to play and says she loves it.  She's excited to get ready for the games and practices and still tells me that she's going to score a goal. {Umm, you actually have to PLAY to do that, dear.}  What gives?  I know she's a shy girl, so maybe she's just not as comfortable around all the people yet?  Maybe she doesn't want to be the center of attention on the field?  I'm not sure!

I will say that, at her game last Friday night, she DID go in the game.  For a minute.  But she did go in.  And she scored a goal...
...and then, after a few team high fives, she ran over to the concession stand to get in line for cheese fries.  In the middle of the game.

Her third game is tonight. We're going to continue to take her, because she seems to want to go.  I'm just hoping I'm doing what's best for her, ya know?  I'll just keep encouraging her to play, without forcing it.  That's about all I can do, right? Maybe she'll play TWO minutes tonight before running to the concession stand {which, I don't blame her much, those cheese fries are good.}

Anyone else have a super shy kid?  We had the exact opposite problem with Carter, so this is all new to us.  I'll take all the help I can get...

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

My 6 year old was super shy at Brynn's age. She hated big crowds and melted down even going to the park. What really opened her up was when she started kindergarten last year. Sure, she didn't talk to anybody the first week (including her teacher) but once she got used to her surroundings and knew that mommy and daddy would be back everyday to pick her up, she loved it. This year, she practically runs to class and doesn't look back. Maybe talk to Brynn and let her know that you will be there on the sidelines and that if she wants to play soccer, she has to do it on her own. It's hard at first, but once she gets into it she will be okay.

Anonymous said...

My daughter is the same age and we just started soccer 3 weeks ago as well. The first day was a disaster, she just stood there and didn't do anything. The second time it was better, though she didn't talk to anyone, she did participate in the drills with her team. I am hoping tomorrow she talks to someone! She has always been super shy and takes a really long time to warm up to people, I would just give it time as long as she still wants to go.

Lisa said...

I know not every time is possible, but maybe it would help if Carter took her up and helped her?? I know my daughter seems to be less shy with big brother than me. Just a thought.........

Marjorie said...

I wish I knew what to say! My three year daughter is doing the same thing right now at ballet. She says she wants to dance, I bring her, she cries or wants me to hold her the whole session. It's really frustrating as a parent. I guess I'll keep taking her and see what happens? It can only get better, right??

burke94 said...

I can totally relate to Brynn as I was shy myself...I have gotten better as I got older. For me I was afraid that I would do something wrong (whatever it was) so I just wouldn't do it. Not really sure, but gosh all of your kids are adorable and seem so sweet!

Anonymous said...

I've been feeling horrible about how shy my 3yr old daughter is, she goes to her ballet class but refuses to participate, and in school even though she knows the teacher from my 4yr old being there last year she just stands there watching the other kids while they play. She does the crafts and that is it, wont' play or talk to others really at all and it's a month in. I want to help her but am not sure what I can do. So you're not alone!

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